Tuesday, October 18, 2005

where are you..


when the night
has come
and the land is dark
and the moon
is the only light we'll see

no i won't be afraid
no i won't be afraid
just as long as you
stand by me.

darling darling
stand by me
stand by me
just as long
as you stand
stand by me...

if the sky
that we look upon
should tumble and fall
or the mountains
should crumple to the sea

i won't cry
i won't cry
no i won't shed a tear
just as long
as you stand
stand by me...
____________________

this song, probably one of my favourite song. it holds alot of meaning to me actually which i really dont know why either. and this song lyrics are just sweet larx.

we as humans, i think we want alot alot alot alot of attention from others. like if we heard that someone is jealous over the little attention you gave to her/him, you actually feel a little happy, like hey, i mean something to this person. hahaha. i actually do enjoy that tiny cheap thrill. hahaha. though i dont get it often. haha.

sigh.. what's exactly going through our heads everytime? its so hard to comprehend a human's thinking, moreover knowing how to control the emotions. we basically are slaves to our emotions. yes, you din see the word wrongly, i did mention slaves. tell me how can it be that we aren't? we just listen to our emotions, to our heart. sometimes, listening and following our heart is wrong. we cant do things blindly. but we still do.

example person A is attached to person B and person C is their good friend. one fine day, person C falls for person A. person C say that he know its wrong, but he really love person A.

see. you know its wrong, yet you still listen, so tell me, you aint a slave, a prisoner to your heart, to your emotions.

do you realise, we got thousands and thousands of restriction living here on earth, and tell me about liberation. does liberation really help? in the messy and chaotic world we're living in, tell me liberation help. someone tell me that. do we still know how to be a real human?

humans are scarier then snakes, crocodiles, lions, tigers yadayada. they are beast, so its normal that they behave in ways we find wrong. but humans, backstab, yadayada. they are one kind infront of one person and another kind infront of another person. we can never guess what they are thinking. am i losing my faith and hope on mankind already?

i myself am part of the human race, i believe part of me had been bad and mean before. but are we ready to receive critics of how we live our lifes? how well can you take criticism? how open are you to changes? who's living in you?

i seem to be re-tracking. back to my comfort zone. tell you where i feel like i'm myself.

i feel like when i'm myself when-

1. i'm alone
2. with God
3. with wohwoh
4. with msg
5. with potatoes
6. with music
7. with my family. (it's here because sometimes we just try so hard living up to their standards)
8. with some of my sec sch mates

besides that, i'm probably not myself? hahah. not really larx. but i might be more withdrawn.

what will you do, if i say, i miss you.
how about, i love you.
or if i were to say you were my honey, sugar, sweetie pie.

ahahahahaha. perceptions perceptions. never ending judgement we made on ourselves and people around us. when will this internal conflict end.....

He blessed me at 11:10 PM



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