is the fire in your heart burning, or is it dying off?
i watched a very inspiring video yesterday during TNG(The Next Generation) service. and i really truly believe that the most impactful sermon anyone can ever give, is their own life testimony. of course, the problems that the guy faced may or may not be applicable to us. like alcoholism, drug abuse, blablabla. however he said something which i thought it was so so true.
"the first step to recovery is to acknowledge the fact that you have a problem"
along that line larx. not exactly. but its true. if we're not even willing to acknowledge there is a problem, how in the world can people around us help, and how in the world can we get out of addiction or a lifestyle that is so wrong? of course, it takes a lot of courage to admit, to say out loud"hey, look here, i have a problem" we're all egoistic people. we want and hope to maintain that image people have on us, but not considering the consequences of hiding it that will cause the devil to have a foothold on us and just slowly draw us away from God. it might seem to you that its not happening, but trust me brothers and sisters, it is. but because we're so blinded by the problem we're trying so hard to hide from the whole world, we fail to realise our relationship with God is very much affected.
know why i never was keen in going into a relationship? i mean, look at me now. single, but my relationship with God could still be swayed by the problems in life. when you're single you have so many problems already. what more, a couple, you're handling another person's problem. i mean, of course, its a joy to be sharing problem with someone you love, but when your relationship with God isnt stable, how are you gonna ensure you'll have a stable relationship with your boyfriend and girlfriend? you get the gist of it? its not as if, i'm some mad people who doesnt need the love of people around me, and only rely on His love. of course His love is more then anything in the world, but He did created a you and a me for a reason. loving is really tough when you dont have God in your life. because its written in the bible that God is love too. so if you know God you know love.
this morning, was in the car listening to some christian radio station. the sermon was about a church. i dont really know how to translate the first point, so lets just leave it out for now. but in any case, the speaker said that a church is a school, where we learn His words. a church is a hospital, where we heal and be healed, for everything was done on the cross. a church is a family, where you find love and trust. a church is an army, where unity is everything in winning the battle against the devil. how many times have we neglected all these about a church? the passion is lacking!! we need to do something before we can witness the revival. and prayer is the key to revival that is coming our way. its not a one person effort, its the entire church's effort.
saying so much, i start to realise, or rather yesterday's video made me realise that the life i've been living wasnt a pleasing sight to Him eh? like kind of just wasting my life away doing nothing that can be glorifying to His name. regrets seep in, making me realise how foolish i was to choose to give in to my own desire of lifestyle. but later only to know, i'm not filled with happiness but with emptiness and loneliness. and then, i just come to a point of revelation that i'm focusing too much on what i can do and not what He can do through me. not acknowledging that i'm lacking so much.
today's leader's meeting also made me ponder over more stuffs about my life, and my cell. i think to a large extent, i have been extremely lenient to them, letting them have what they want and stuffs like that. not that my kiddos are a bunch of naughty kids, but i guess the way i'm bringing them, would make them suffer in the future. probably thinking the whole world would and should give in to them. i guess its high time i need to make my stand clear to them, that we'll grow in His grace and His love for us. i have so much doubts about one of them now, that i just feel so lousy. but i'm just gonna lift that kiddo up to Him. i know if its really my kiddo's problem, He'll convict my kiddo. and if the people who got affected by it in some ways, my apologies. i have no intention to protect my kiddo interest and to hurt the dont know how many people. however, if its the other people's fault, i pray for His grace and mercy upon them as well. let this matter rest forever in its own grave.
i've said all i wanted to say. and no names mentioned! HOORAY! haha. well, thank you for reading the whole entry. and if you did, please keep me in your prayers that i'll continue to be strong in His word and in His love. you'll always be in my prayers. and let's celebrate the great almighty first may-labour day aka sleep in day. hahaha. Be Blessed! (:(:
