i'm feeling super sad now and i really don't know what to do...
when my senior asked if i read the papers today, i felt something wasn't right.. after proceeding to read her blog.. i couldn't believe my eyes..
initially i thought it was some home affair kind of news.. some dispute over money among one family in singapore.. then it strike me.. mr tay.. mdm ong.. telok ayer.. pasir ris.. everything links to Mdm Ong.. my choir teacher who sadly left us last year..
to even know that before her death she got SUED by her mother over money is sad enough.. whatmore, Mdm Ong got hypertension thereafter..
so does it mean her mum was the cause of her death?! i don't know.. its not up to me to judge..
but i'm just sad that Mdm Ong had to leave this world with a law case that has not ended but just begun..
who was that old lady who sob so hard at Mdm Ong's wake..
ahhh why why why..
just when i thought i got over it.. i saw a powerpoint presentation of my friend.. and then now this news..
am i stuck under this well called grief.. or what is it that i have to go through...
and besides this 2 things.. there is another bag of sorrow and despair i have..
Oh lord.. i don't know what to do.. i don't know how to handle.. i'm lost and i don't understand. i'm feeling helpless and nothing that is happening now can soothe it can it? its heartwrenching and i dont know how much more sorrow and grief and heartache can this heart of mine take. but you won't put me into a test too much for me to handle right? what's the limit of lost do i need to feel? what's the limit of sorrow do i need to go through? i'm just feeling so.. URGHHH... sigh.. if only sleep can take away everything.. if death could take away all these.. but its a lie isnt it? i dont know. what's real what's fake? what's right? what's wrong? i felt ur heartache the other time.. can u feel my heartache this time round? tell me what to do Lord.. cause.. i'm just lost...